Monday, December 20, 2010


We're trying to put the baby to sleep. Reading cozy Christmas stuff about gingerbread cookies and flying reindeer and evergreen trees. Suddenly we hear scratching noises coming from the hallway. I figure it's her poor dog going senile and trying to bury her dog biscuit again.

"What's that dog doing?"

"That's not my dog. It's your damned cats again."

We pinpoint the sound in the hallway. Christine's ear is next to the vent, diagnosing. It's coming from the main air intake duct for the heating system. Christine looks up, eyes like watery saucers.

"It's a SKUNK!!!"

I'm thinking "now how in the hell does she know that from the skritchy skritchy sounds coming from the duct? Probably a possum again." Then it hits me. The first wave of the atomic stench. It's kind of thick and oily, like the smoke from green wood.

The damn thing deployed underneath the house, maybe INSIDE the ductwork to the A/C system. Won't know until we remove the duct tape and trash bag sealing off the vent. Not that it helped much.

So now we're camped out in the living room with a fire in the fireplace, all the windows wide open while it rains in successive waves outside.

Merry Skunkmas to All, and to all a good night.


Googling..."A skunk went off underneath my house".